The Tim Tebow Drinking Game

{N.B. I didn't write this, but I wish I had. HCW}

Although he's a great athlete, he IS from Florida....

* Drink every time Tebow is called "a warrior." Bonus chug if any of your friends sing the first two hours lines of Scandal's opus "I am a warrior" and change the lyrics to "Tebow is a warrior." Dance, Tebow, you magnificent bastard.

* Drink every time Tebow's called "a leader," then salute.

* Drink every time Tebow's called a "special athlete," then yell "Tiiiimmmmmmmmay!"

* Finish your drink if the announcers suggest Tebow should win the Heisman again this year.

* Drink every time Tebow points to the sky. Then realize the only reason the sky hasn't fallen is the strength of his pointing.

* Drink every time Tebow references God. Or himself.

* Drink every time he's shown on the sidelines flapping his arms like a bird (or an idiot) to pump up the crowd.

* If (when) Tebow actually takes flight, finish your drink and do a shot.

* Drink every time Tebow's on camera for no reason when the Florida defense is on the field.

* Drink every time Tebow is seen screaming with his helmet off.

* Drink every time they show a "I Heart Tebow" sign in the stands.

* Drink every time you see a Florida fan in jorts. (Small sips on this one. Otherwise it could kill you).

* Shot every time they mention his experience as missionary.

* If they mention him performing circumcisions in the Philippines while he was a missionary - Chug your beer, do a shot of Patron.

**When Alabama wins and Tebow gives a tearful speech in the post-game press conference, give the television the bird, turn up your bottle of Jim Beam, and don't stop drinking OR flipping off the TV till Tebow runs out of tears. (This may take several bottles of Jim) Then throw the empty bottle(s) through the television and quote the good book by saying "the Terrence Cody falls upon the just and the unjust alike!" Club a baby seal and start prepping for Texas.

Disclaimer: Playing the Tebow drinking game may will result in death. So don't do it. Ever. Not even in jest. The content above this disclaimer is a joke, not a suggestion. If you're dumb enough to do it, just pray Tebow is nearby. Only he can save you. Him or a local hospital with a stomach pump.