Bruce Pearl is Orange.

Bruce Pearl is Orange. I came to this unsettling realization while watching the UT-Marquette game last night.  He.Is.Orange.  Not figuratively orange, in the way that we Kentucky fans say that we bleed blue.  Orange in the literal sense: as he enters his fourth season of coaching, his skin is actually turning that unflattering Volunteer shade. Said condition was made even more evident when his lookalike son Steven took the floor last night. Young Steve had a regular old Caucasian hue about him, which made his father's condition even more confusing.

Now, at first, I thought that Coach Pearl was just taking on the tone of the hideous blazer he rolls out for UK or Vandy games.  Any girl who grew up in the Seventies or Eighties has read her mother/aunt/sister's hand-me-down copy of Color Me Beautiful and could tell him that this is a supremely limiting shade that only works with the most dramatic Autumn coloring.  However, during last night's contest, our friend Bruce was wearing --ahem-- a pearl-grey suit.  And he was still orange!  Not the healthy glow that results from a week in Saint-Tropez or a quality bronzer.  More like a Tanorexics Anonymous meeting of Tara Reid, Charlize Theron and Paris Hilton.

What is it, Bruce?  Are you hitting the local Sun Tan City after practice? Are you getting too much beta carotene in your diet?  Are you just overdosing on Rocky Top Orange?

I really need to know....

xo--
h